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Tired of being angry? I am! I’m tired of looking in their eyes after I’ve yelled – again – seeing the hurt I’ve caused. How can we stop being an angry mom?
The kids made a mess. Again. The baby won’t sleep. Again. There’s a diaper blow-out as your walking out the door – late. Again. Your picky eater won’t eat her veggies. Again. Bedtime is a nightmare. Again. Enter Angry Mom!
Ever have one of those days? Or more? Those days where you look at the clock and count ahead to see how much longer until bedtime. Yours… not theirs! We’ve all had those days. Probably more often than we can count. And, we’ll probably have more.
How do you deal with those days? Are you able to go with the flow taking whatever life throws your way? Or, are you a ticking time bomb ready explode at the next mishap or toddler tear?
I hate to admit that I tend to fall in the latter category. I don’t ebb and flow very easily, and my temper is short. More often than not I snap out a retort or a command or word of exasperation before I even realize it.
I end up feeling bad about the kind of mom I am. I end up hurting my kids’ feelings and possibly even their self-esteem. Worse even, I’m teaching them that my behavior is the example they need to follow.
I’m breaking the cycle now! Wanna join me?
Stop Being An Angry Mom
So, how can we handle our emotions and find hope? First, know that anger is a normal emotion. If you are a living, breathing being, you will become angry about something at some point in the future. And, that’s okay. It’s normal. It’s what you do with that anger that will lead you to despair or to hope.
Pray. If you deal with anger on a daily basis, as I do, PRAY. Ask God to change your heart. He loves you (and me), and wants the best for you. He wants you to lead your kids with a heart like His. And, when you mess up and yell again, he’ll be there to pick you back up and start all over again.
Apologize. It’s so very humbling and even a bit embarrassing to have to admit that I acted like a child. I let my anger get the best of me. But our loved ones need to know that we truly are sorry, and that we are trying to change our own behavior.
Take a break. When you feel anger bubbling up, leave the room. It’s okay to take a time out in your room before exploding in anger at your family. Actually, it’s best for everyone involved.
Eliminate distractions. I can’t count how many times I have gotten angry at a child, because they interrupted my distractions. I’m peacefully scrolling through my Facebook feed when a child needs my attention. I ask them politely to ‘give me just a minute’ to finish what I’m doing. Then, said child begins to ask more forcefully for my attention. I get angry and snap back before realizing 15 minutes has passed, because I was distracted.
I’m not saying you can’t go on Facebook or read a blog or finish the next chapter of your book before attending to a child’s non-emergency needs. But, you need to prioritize. Believe me when I say that I’m preaching to the choir! I know that I’m snappy when I’m distracted.
Realize why you’re angry. Are you taking things too personally? Are you stressed out about something? Are you emotionally drained and in need of recharging? Are your expectations too high? Has being angry simply become a bad habit you can’t seem to break free from?
So, how can we break free? Where can we find hope and encouragement to break the anger cycle?
For me, anger has become a habit. My mouth speaks with a sharp tone before I even have time to think about it. But, I want to be the lady in the picture above. I want to be free from anger. I don’t want my kids to remember me being snippy and snappy all the time.
I don’t like how it makes me feel inside. And, I don’t like how my anger makes my kids feel about me and about themselves. So, I am super excited to take part in this amazing 7 Days to a Less Angry Mom online video course. Alicia Michelle, from Your Vibrant Family, is an amazing encourager and mentor. I went through another of her e-courses last year, and I know that this one will be just as helpful.
With 7 videos and over 50 printable pages of tips and homework, I’m making this course a priority for the week. Each of the videos is 10-20 minutes long. I know that sometimes it seems hard to find that much “free” time in your day, but won’t it be worth it. There’s also a private Facebook group where we can go for encouragement and accountability.
Won’t it be worth it to go to bed feeling like you haven’t blown it? Won’t it be worth it to not wake up having to pray that God would guard your tongue before you ever roll out of bed? I think it is!
Will you join me? The 7 Days to a Less Angry Mom course is now open!